Je n'écris jamais de commentaire sur les produits que j'achète, mais bon, pour celui-là j'ai senti qu'il était mon devoir de le faire. Ce livre est formidable. Ce livre nous apprend à distinguer nos émotions, et nous explique brillamment comment les canaliser (plutôt que de les refouler ou bien de les exprimer de manière inadéquate). Je n'ai pas encore fini de le lire, mais les informations que j'ai déjà apprises dans ce livre ont changées ma façon de voir les choses et m'ont permis de résoudre ma colère refoulée et d'améliorer mes problèmes d'anxiété. Ce livre explique le lien qui existe entre les différentes émotions, et leur dynamique.
Je dois avouer que j'ai trouvé le début du livre un peu long, mais c'est néanmoins nécessaire pour bien comprendre la suite (c'est aussi très instructif). J'ai hâte de finir de le lire, et je pense que je m'y réfèrerai souvent.
Karla Mclaren est un guide très expérimenté pour accompagner dans le dédale du monde des émotions. Vous en ressortirez clarifié et solide ! Sa vision est originale et ses propositions très efficaces. Elle vous aidera à assimiler que vos émotions sont TRÈS intelligentes et que leur intervention est un aide à tous moments... si vous comprenez ce qu'elles viennent vous dire.
This book is tremendous and at times excruciatingly insightful. The author has a fantastic understanding of emotions and healing and is able to articulate it in an easy to read from with concrete examples. The truth just pours from the pages--gives me goosebumps.
Before I had read this book, I had the experience of "going into the emotion"--just feeling it for what it was--not analyzing, etc. It is absolutely true that when you do that, and leave out the story--that the emotion quickly dissipates. I had not thought of it as giving me energy and life force--but after reading this book--perhaps that is exactly what it is. My personal experience in dealing with transforming emotions has been very powerful--and this book gives the reader instructions to do that very easily. Of course, you have to be willing---sometimes when I am angry I don't necessarily want to give up the story or move on from the anger. But repressing that feeling--or any feeling leads to disease--so it is especially great for me to have a book that can kind of prod me to move on and deal with any feeling in a healthy way.
I thought the sections and breakdown of each emotion was insightful. The author lets you know what gifts that emotion can bring. She also articulates what power comes from that emotion. And lets you know what being stuck in that emotion can do to you. Her description of each one was exactly the same as my experiences. The difference is that she has been able to put it into a great teachable format and I have not.
There are many self-help books out there in the world. I find that a lot of books have some good and a lot not so good. Or that the book promises a lot but doesn't really have the substance to deliver. This book is absolutely fabulous--it has the substance and the entire book is excellent. I would have this on a short list--in the top 5 if not top 3 of self-help books to read.
I also have this audio series. It is great to have the audible version--however, i personally have found that I prefer the book to the audible version as it is easier for me to reference. I do love the audio version for on the go.
This book is not for the faint hearted or for someone who wishes that someone could raise a magic wand and fix them. It won't make the work easy--but it gives you a clear path and proper guidance on how to do the work.
The author is also very responsible in letting the reader know that not everyone is best suited to do the work alone--and directs readers to therapists/support groups to aid in their discovery. Being a mental health professional I appreciate that as it is acknowledging that this work can be very powerful and sometimes it is good to have a person to work with.
I anticipate that this will be a book I will turn to again and again--both for personal and professional reference.
BRAVO to the author!!!!
65 internautes sur 69 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile
I do processed oriented hypnosis with clients and was happy to get this book from the Amazon review program to check out. I have read a lot of books on hypnosis, on emotions, and self-help books in general. Suggestive hypnotic technique tends to only have an effect for about 3 months (for instance, a well placed suggestion to end cigarette smoking seems to stop working after about 3 months). Many methods simply do not go deep enough to shift a person in a relatively permanent way. This book is by an author who has discovered some methods very similar to what I have found to work for me and my clients. It is more based on meditation than trying to superficially fix something in a person. It looks to how we relate to our emotional life and how to heal our way of disassociating and distracting ourselves from how we feel. It helps a person form a healthy relationship with his or her emotional life. It affirms the validity of all our emotional feelings and how to be present to our emotional life. It gives a lot of examples about what each emotion means and what each emotion wants to give to us. Because it similar to what I have been doing, I found a lot of exercises and thoughts useful for refining my technique a little further. It requires the client to learn how to stay in touch with his or her emotions, to be present with them, and to be responsible to them (an important theme). One warning: This book is very thick and does not waste words. It could be a training manual, though it reads more poetically and personally than the usual kind. I consider this one to be the best book on emotions yet that I have read. It would be very useful for anyone, but seems ideal for someone working with others.
25 internautes sur 26 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile
Fabulous look at our emotions.21 juillet 2010
Kathleen J Toney
- Publié sur Amazon.com
Very well written. No doubt you will see bits and pieces of your own psyche, as well as those of friends and loved ones. If you must learn more about emotions.....this is the most complete out there. Highly recommended. I purchased multiple copies of this for family members. Maybe will buy another for my best friend. There's nothing to dislike about this book. People don't know how to deal with emotions. The author tackles them head-on.
23 internautes sur 24 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile
When I saw the comment about this book by Gavin de Becker, I was intrigued. His book, The Gift of Fear, is one of the books I most recommend to others. He said, "This book changed the way I relate to others, and to myself, forever."
I've read a LOT of self-help books (and wrote one), and this is one of the most original I've ever come across. I usually prefer books by scientists like Martin Seligman or John Gottman, but there isn't much in the way of research or studies in The Language of Emotions. The author, Karla McLaren, is not anti-science, but this book is very personal and her expertise is personal. The material is refreshing and makes sense, but you won't get a lot of "proof" other than your own experience, which sometimes is enough.
In this book, McLaren is presenting a new way of understanding how the emotions you feel today can bring you wisdom and understanding (if approached in the right way). She asks you to see your emotions as "specific and brilliant messengers," and she shows you how to do it.
The way we normally think of emotions is wrong, says McLaren. There are no "good" emotions or "bad" emotions. All emotions are valueable and necessary and can help us, and she is not referring to any kind of positive thinking here or trying to transform "negative emotions" into "positive emotions." She's talking about something more authentic and profound. This is a very different way of thinking about emotions; considering that they have skills, functions, gifts. Each emotion has a different purpose.
The first part of the book explains all this and how McLaren came to her conclusions. The last part of the book gives you instructions and examples of applying these ideas to specific emotions, one emotion per chapter. If you'd like to raise your "emotional intelligence" or deal with your emotions more capably and responsibly, I recommend this book.
59 internautes sur 74 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile
MIXED AND UNINFORMATIVE INFO: In the first part of the book the author goes on about her wonderful family and then quickly we hear about abuse she suffered from a neighbor. I find it amazing to imagine how a "wonderful" family can be oblivious of a child's abuse...I guess they just thought she was weird, or they were horribly naive. Later the author talks of her intuitive nature and how she is an empath. Though this is oft repeated, I guess I never quite felt she described what this is and why it makes her uniquely qualified to write this book.
HOW TO BALANCE YOUR EMOTIONS...WAY TOO DEEP IN THE BOOK In the chapter on balance right after she describes the elements of our nature,she then gives us a description on what we should do to balance ourselves. Quite frankly this was useless. At least with a Myer-Brigg type of personality test I get a sense of what my elements are and where to start. With this, I have to guess at best and the descriptions on what to do were quite scattered and dependent on knowing what your issues were..If I knew, I wouldn't be reading this book? Later, much later these items are handled in more depth and I feel in a much more useful way. However I felt I had to slog through a lot of repetition to get there.
SECTION ON TRAUMA On the section on trauma, she made a few very good points regarding initiation. Essentially in many tribal cultures there is education, initiation and then acknowledgment. She indicated our culture does not have this process. I disagree. Though we don't equal tribal cultures, in this respect, I think there are very many minor initiations that a child passes through in our culture: Potty Training, Sitting at the big table, First day of school, Various religious based initiations, Graduation, Marriage, Funerals, etc. Are they profound and life altering? Some are, some aren't. Ask any child that goes to kindergarten, high school or college, if their life has changed. However her point was well made that trauma is initiation done at the wrong time, by the wrong person, for the wrong reasons. This was a quote she borrowed from another psychologist. Also in trauma, there is no preparation or acknowledgement of this life-changing event, the person is left hanging and confused, not knowing what to think or get closure. However in this section as in many, the author becomes very repetitive. I felt often she was trying to say the same thing over and over again from different angles. Once really would have been enough.
SECTION ON ANGER AND FORGIVENESS: I finally found some info that I think was really useful in this section. Basically the author stated that forgiveness without processing the anger for the hurt or trauma or hurt does the person more harm than good. Luckily, personally I have never been subjected to some of the profound traumas inflicted on either the author or some of the people she worked with, but being human, I have met with a reasonable number of disappointments in my life regarding others. So often you have read or have been taught in church, that you must forgive. However, I do agree as the author points out, you must first give anger it's due and only then can you forgive. To do otherwise is to further trap yourself in a loop of this trauma or disappointment. Very good point.
SUMMARY WITHOUT READING WHOLE BOOK: I have alternatively picked up and put down this book for months. I just can't slog through it any more. There are many good points. Nuggets of real value. However they are buried in volumes of repetitious prose. Also this is buried within new age descriptions of your personal nature (Air, Water, yada, yada). So when each case describes what you should do for people who's Air and Water weren't in balance (sounds like my car) you were left wondering if this is pertinent to you or not. As I noted ealier, there was no real way to quantify your nature. I have no issues with new age info (look at my other reviews), but we all need guidelines to reference ourselves, relative to significant new terms.
A suggestion to reach a broader audience. I didn't get this book to read about the author.. Limit that section. If I am to be given advice about how to bring my emotions into balance, give me a way to quantify the balance they are in first Then in relatively short order, discuss the how and why to correct each issue. I think most people would like to use this book as a combination reference as well as education on emotions, as well as a rough means of measuring where they stand and a set of corrective actions. Unfortunately, this book isn't it.