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When He's Married to Mom: How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open Their Hearts to True Love and Commitment (English Edition) [Format Kindle]

Kenneth M. Adams , Alexander P. Morgan

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Revue de presse

"Dr. Ken Adams has done it again. This book on mother-son enmeshment explains not only this too little understood developmental block, but points the way to liberation. The absence of psychobabble makes it clear reading both for victims and their clinicians." -- John Franklin, Ph.D., Distinguished Professor of Counseling and Addiction Studies, University of Detroit Mercy

"An engaging, clear, and extremely useful examination of this most common of family problems....’ÄâI do a lot of couples therapy in my practice, and this is one of the most common unhealthy dynamics I see. This book will be enormously helpful." -- John C. Friel, Ph.D., author of Adult Children

"It is a compelling, insightful, and helpful guide out of the sexual and romantic labyrinths families weave." -- Patrick J. Carnes, Ph.D., author of Out of the Shadows

Présentation de l'éditeur

When a Woman Is in an Emotional Tug-of-War for Her Man's Heart

Why can't he commit? Many women find themselves asking this question when in love with a man who won't get married, won't stop womanizing, or refuses to give up his sex addictions. Often this kind of man is bound by an unhealthy attachment to his mother. This phenomenon is called "mother-son enmeshment." In When He's Married to Mom, clinical psychologist and renowned intimacy expert Dr. Kenneth M. Adams goes beyond the stereotypes of momma's boys and meddling mothers to explain how mother-son enmeshment affects everyone: the mother, the son, and the woman who loves him. In his twenty-five years of practice, Dr. Adams has successfully treated hundreds of enmeshed men and shares their stories in this informative guide. He provides proven methods to make things better, including:

-- Guidelines to help women create fulfilling relationships with mother-enmeshed men
-- Tools to help mother-enmeshed men have healthy and successful dating experiences leading to serious relationships and marriage
-- Strategies to help parents avoid enmeshing their children

When He's Married to Mom provides practical and compassionate advice to the women who are involved with mother-enmeshed men, to the mothers who wish to set them free, and to the men themselves.

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Commentaires client les plus utiles sur (beta) 4.7 étoiles sur 5  38 commentaires
23 internautes sur 24 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 Great! 3 avril 2008
Par RetroGurl - Publié sur
I swear this book was made for me. I have been dealing with a husband who is an only child, who is not only spoiled but married to his parents. His mother is very manipulative and controlling and my husband has been dealing with her for so long, he knows no other way to be. This book is great for learning tools to deal with your anger and frustration, without blowing up. I still can't let myself be close to my mother-in-law but I am learning to control my anger that was eating me up inside. I often told my husband that he was married to his mom and not me, and I was right!
20 internautes sur 22 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 Great Informative Book..... 16 septembre 2009
Par Deborah L. Scanlon - Publié sur
This book is about Mother Enmeshed Men and it will answer any questions you have about men who seem to be "married" to their moms instead of their wives or girlfriends. My husband is mother enmeshed and I never understood why he always took her side, did everything on earth for her, including vacations and paying for her house and repairs, until I read this book. I always told him I was tired of being second best and I would tell him it's like your mom is your wife, not me. He would blow it off, as usual, and say I was imagining things. Well I was not imagining things at all. This book explained all the ways a mother can make her son be her substitute husband, companion. Most often, the father is absent in some way, either divorced, deceased or just plain not there, probably because he was an emeshed man himself. The wife comes to depend on her son for all her needs, except sexual, and teaches him to respond to all those needs so he soon knows no other way then to cater to her needs. Guilt and shame develop when he feels like he can't do enough for her, plus try to move on with his own life, and so the enmeshment is created, forever, unless therapy is sought to correct it. My daughter bought this book for me and I am so glad she did because it has helped me understand alot about my husband. Now I need to try to convince him he needs therapy to get better and free himself from his guilt and shame and the addictions enmeshment causes. Oh, and it can happen to women too. My best friend is a mother enmeshed woman and now I know how to help her fix her life. Best book ever if you are in this kind of situation or know someone who is.
16 internautes sur 17 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 Wish I had read this decades ago! 6 décembre 2013
Par datura222 - Publié sur
This book has helped my husband realize for the first time in his 40 year long life, that he has not been treating me the way a typical man would treat a wife. He has always chosen his mothers needs, wants and feelings as a priority above my own. In the past he has allowed her to make extremely damaging, toxic remarks to me without any repercussion. My husband understands now that he was placed, unknowingly, into the role of that of a surrogate husband due to the lack of intimacy within his parent's marriage.
I wish I had known about this book decades ago. I have put up with 20 years of abuse and my marriage has been nearly decimated by resentment, anger and sadness. I hope we can still make it through now that my husband has seen reality.
19 internautes sur 21 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 Excellent - A real-eye-opener!! 3 juillet 2007
Par Kathleen M. Vanwey - Publié sur
I had read our library's copy of this book. It was informative and had easy-to-read case studies of men who are enmeshed with their mothers. More importantly, it contains suggestions on how to help the guys out of this dilemna or helps the gals see when it's time to end the relationship.

I just ordered two copies for gifts. Ladies, if you've run into too many 'momma's boys' or 'commitment-phobes," this could be the book for you.
8 internautes sur 9 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 Contents Better Than Title 9 mai 2012
Par Markus Youssef - Publié sur
A certain number of mothers overly posses their sons. Do you ever wonder why the fathers don't step in and "save" them? The author offers this for consideration, that in some cases, "The father wants to escape from his wife and uses his son as a placating sacrifice: Take him and let me go." (pg 16) He begins the book with, "There is a universe of difference between a mother who loves her son dearly and a mother who makes her son the primary focus of her passion and preoccupation in an attempt to compensate for her own emptiness. I invite readers to clarify this distinction." A few more quotes from the book: "The templates established by childhood relationships are an active overlay on adult relationships," "The template can be transposed," "Making bad choices keeps him dependent on and loyal to his mother - this is not a conscious thought process." The author has taken a touchy subject, perhaps even a sacred cow, and managed to make it very digestable and easy to read. No blame is placed on the mother. Although the book seems marketed for women dealing with proverbial Momma-Boy husbands, I can't help but think that many men might find it useful in furthering their personal growth. This would make a nice complement to IRON JOHN.
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