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Why Men Marry Bitches: A Woman's Guide to Winning Her Man's Heart
 
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Why Men Marry Bitches: A Woman's Guide to Winning Her Man's Heart [Format Kindle]

Sherry Argov

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Descriptions du produit

Revue de presse

"We're talking about having so much self-respect Aretha Franklin would high-five you."
-- Los Angeles Times

"Sherry Argov encourages women who feel like doormats to develop a sense of independence."
-- Playboy

Présentation de l'éditeur

Make him chase you...Until you catch him.

Never shy and always laugh-out-loud funny, Sherry Argov's Why Men Marry Bitches is a sharp-witted manifesto that shows women how to transform a casual relationship into a committed one. With the grittiest of girlfriend-to-girlfriend detail, Argov removes the kid gloves and explains why being extra nice doesn't necessarily mean he'll be more devoted. The guide shares real-life "no holds barred" interviews with men who answer the following in raw detail:

  • How do men manipulate a relationship to keep it casual?

  • Do men deliberately push women's emotional buttons?

  • How can she convince him commitment was his idea?

  • How can she invite a proposal without saying a word?


Whether you are single, married, recently separated, or just fed up with your family members telling you to fetch a husband because time is running out, Why Men Marry Bitches is the must-have guide that will show you how to exude confidence, win his heart, and get the love and respect you deserve.

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Amazon.com: 4.6 étoiles sur 5  395 commentaires
407 internautes sur 430 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 WHY MEN MARRY BITCHES IS SUPERIOR 7 février 2007
Par Benji - Publié sur Amazon.com
Format:Broché
I respectfully disagree with the previous reviewer who said that Argov's first book was better. As a guy, I thought the exact opposite: "Why Men MARRY Bitches" gives women much more sorely-needed advice.

This book is not about marriage. It's about why single women don't enter relationships that progress, and would be a good read for single and married women.

From a male's perspective, I was amazed at how well it gets into the minds of men and tells women what makes us want to be exclusive, what makes us lose interest in other women, what we respect... "marry" nails it from a man's perspective. The first book Argov talks about things that are obvious and predictable, like whether or not to sleep with the guy on the first date. "Why Men MARRY Bitches" talks about how a guy will test a girl, how he may manipulate her to keep the relationship casual, how a guy might lead her to believe he's interested in committing and then do the "holding pattern" with the "I'm really busy with work" excuses. The advice in the last chapter on what a women should say to a guy when it isn't progressing is outstanding. It tells women why things don't progress, and that's where most women need help. They have no problem catching a guy, it's keeping him around where it gets messed up and that's why "Why Men Marry Bitches" is superior.

Also, I can confirm Argov would have no way of knowing the things she discloses in this book unless she actually sat down and interviewed us men. I found myself saying under my breath, "Who told her this?" on almost every page. I was blown away by the discussions of how men are made to feel they are "filling a position" when a women talks about "wanting to get married" (but doesn't matter to whom). It is such valuable information for women to read.

I also think the chapter called "Wanted Joe Paycheck" in "Why Men Marry Bitches" is brilliant. Argov describes that a guy won't mind paying for a dinner, but we won't attach himself to a woman who has the "attitude of entitlement." There are really good examples about women planning the excessive wedding arrangements, a woman who quits her job without consulting with her fiance, and so on....it's something EVERY SINGLE woman needs to educate herself on if she wants to keep a guy around because we will not commit if we feel like an ATM machine.

There's no question most women don't even know how they are being perceived by men. So they are trying to get respect but don't know how. I like and respect women, and think they should be treated with respect, which is what the author is teaching women to demand.

I gave "Why Men Marry Bitches" five stars. If I could, I would give this book six. It's a very "real" book that is also entertaining and funny--and both men and women should absolutely pick it up.
82 internautes sur 91 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 Stop Being a Filler Girl, and Start Being The Guy's "Soul Mate". 23 mars 2011
Par helluvagoodnews - Publié sur Amazon.com
Format:Broché|Achat vérifié
A "Filler Girl", in my humble definition, is the girl that a guy keeps around for the sole purpose of just, well, keeping her around. For no reason, really... Except maybe sex, and that's it. The Filler Girl is usually the girl who was asked out not even a month after the guy's break-up with another girl (She's the "rebound girl", in other words.)... Or maybe she's the girl who asks the guy out, and while the guy isn't too crazy about her, she seems easy enough to keep him company until he's sick of her. You are tortured by endless hours of worrying that he's cheating on you, or if he's still in love with an old lover/friend, or if he even loves you as much as you love him...

Stop. Stop being that Filler Girl, and start being the MAIN Girl that the guy actually WANTS. I was once the Filler Girl... I was desperate, easy (not in a sexual way, but like, just how easy it was for me to agree with everything he says), and I guess, boring... Not remarkable in any way. I would try to be the perfect girlfriend for the guys that I liked... Only to realize that, while their hand is in mine, their heart was in some other girl...

I decided that after getting my heart smashed into pieces (and messing up potentially life-lasting relationships and even friendships), I've decided to change my route. I brought this book and started to read the whole book as fast as I could. Some pages made me gasp in shock, but I pressed on... As each chapters went by, I know realized what my issues were and now I am able to grasp what I should do and say instead if I'm EVER going to find a guy who will want to settle down with me. Granted, I'm only 20, so I do have some time ahead... But, I would just love to have a serious, long-term relationship with someone for some years until we get engaged, get married, and be happy together for good. The book was so good that now I'm re-reading it again the second time to really absorb everything. I like that the author doesn't want the reader to play games, but rather, stop the games that men play before they even begin. Be nice until the other guy disrespects, then go ahead and push him away. The more you pull away, the more they come after you... And as I sit here, I realize how true that saying is, as I remember all the times I would pull away from families, friends, and even lovers because I felt like I needed to be alone, and they all just RAN AFTER ME! It's crazy, right?

So stop being the Filler Girl. Stop being that girl who the guy SETTLED for when he couldn't get with that other girl instead... Stop being his booty call. Stop being the girl he isn't enthusiastic about... Be the girl he wants, the girl he would write songs about, the girl who he thinks about all the time... You're all wonderful ladies who deserve that kind of love that you've always wanted. And with this book, you can get that kind of love, and more. :)

PS- The ONLY thing I disagree about this book was when the author wrote that for every time the guy calls you, to not pick up 100% of the time. I mean, it's weird she would say that when in the book she says not to put up with a guy who doesn't pick up the phone, or take a few hours to get back to you. Basically... DON'T PLAY GAMES LIKE THIS UNTIL THE OTHER GUY DOES IT, AND WHEN HE DOES, PLAY IT RIGHT BACK. That is all.
62 internautes sur 73 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 AS HILARIOUS AS STAND UP COMEDY, AND AS SMART AS A WHIP 18 juin 2006
Par Sarah Ivask - Publié sur Amazon.com
Format:Broché
"Why Men Marry Bitches" is the best book on relationships. Whenever my male friends read through the book they say, "Wow. She is 100% right. How did she get this information?"

What I LOVE so much about this book is that it shows you HOW men view commitment, and the REAL reasons why men don't want to get involved. In the book, men reveal that they want an emotional connection as much as women do, but often feel they aren't "special" because most women seem like they want a commitment...with ANYBODY. Doesn't matter who the guy is, she wants a commitment before she knows his middle name. And Argov explains with crystal clarity exactly what turns men off, and how a few small modifications in a woman's words or actions makes all the difference in the world.

For example, the author explains that women sometimes ask questions or say things like "Where is this going?" or "What are your intentions?" before she even knows where the guy lives. When a guy gets those types of questions, he automatically assumes she is in love with "the idea" of a commitment, or that she's in love with "the wedding" or what a relationship represents. At that point he keeps her at arm's length, because (as men explain in their own words) what they dream of is a woman who is in love....WITH WHO HE IS! She won't just commit to anyone.

Argov has a rare ability to make you laugh and at the same time helps you realize how to do better. It's a feel good read that is entertaining and brilliant at the same time. You walk away feeling like you stand a little taller, and that men are likeable, sensitive and human. If you've ever wondered why most relationships stall after two or three months, after reading this book, YOU'LL GET IT.

What I love most is the fact that Argov doesn't tell you what you are doing wrong...she explains how you can do it right. She never talks down to the reader. She doesn't bash men. She even makes fun of herself. She gives you the feeling that she's down to earth and real, and that she's kicking back over a beer with you hanging out and cheering you up like a sister would. But at the same time, she gives the kind of seasoned advice that a relative or best friend would give about dignity and pride. And of course, she shows you how to turn the typical dating dynamic around so that he comes away feeling like COMMITMENT WAS HIS IDEA!

If you buy this book and get past the title--you will find it refreshing, hilariously funny, and extremely enlightening. I never give 5 stars for anything. But this one is 5 star worthy because of the information....as well as the entertainment comedy value. You'll laugh out loud reading it.
235 internautes sur 287 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
3.0 étoiles sur 5 Self confident women are indeed sexy, but her relationship advice is for the cavewoman 9 mars 2007
Par Indy Reviewer - Publié sur Amazon.com
Format:Broché
The good news is that comedian Sherry Argov's relationship-advice focused "Why Men Marry Bitches" is an improvement on the dating-focused "Why Men Love Bitches." Her basic premise of men wanting self-confident, assertive, and competent women is dead on, and several of the 75 "relationship principles" are quite accurate. The bad news is that the majority of her advice is not only bad but potentially outright destructive to the majority of modern relationships. I come up with 3 stars after averaging a worthy 5 for the message of self-esteem with a 1 for some utterly bone-headed assumptions.

On the positive side, Argov's basic message is quite sound. To quote the author, "men want a competent woman who can think for herself, handle her business, take charge, and tell him to knock off the foolishness," and many of the 75 points explain exactly why this is the case. Some advice is dead on accurate; dressing for success, being yourself, realizing that you can't change someone, making sure you're happy with who you are and "standing up for what you believe in a decent and honest way" are all really good points that tackle some basic mistakes women who aren't experienced in relationships (and some who are) make. The underlying message of self-respect comes through loud and clear; unsurprisingly, the basic premise of "if a woman thinks all she has to offer is sex...(she's less desirable)" is the backbone of an entire chapter. Good stuff.

Where it fails miserably is her relationship advice. In fairness, there the occasional nugget or two like "Just like women can't get too many compliments, a man can't get too much appreciation for his contribution." Any number of psychologists will tell you the same but far more murkily, and warning women about an "attitude of entitlement" scaring men away is a valuable insight.

Unfortunately, Argov's knowledge of the opposite gender appears limited to confirming what she's heard from other women about men rather than rather than the much harder task of trying to put herself in men's shoes. Despite interviewing a few men, she spews out some absurdly sexist assumptions. One particularly egregious but typical stereotype is that "men (are) socialized to think women are the weaker sex," and that men "want to turn back the clock" and "jest about women in the police force...and military." The sole objective of a man with a woman is "obviously...to jump into bed." In short, men haven't evolved from the Cro-Magnon age.

From this shaky basis of understanding comes even weaker advice. According to Argov, men get turned off by "my clock is ticking" and "so where do we stand" because it's "too obvious," where instead what really turns off many are that children and marriage are a continuation of a great relationship, not a goal in and of itself. More troubling are tidbits like "avert a fight (over bad behavior)...with one sentence responses" and "negotiations should be 95% nonverbal." This may get women what they want near term, but if they can't come up with an effective way to communicate with their partners about such issues any relationship is in real danger longer term. Men can be made to cook dinner by a deal agreeing that whomever gets home first does so, except if the woman gets home early they should drive around randomly to make sure he does instead. This resembles the disastrous advice in her first book about how a woman whose husband didn't want to pay for housekeeping services simply claimed to spend a little more for grocery shopping and paid for it that way behind his back. Anyone who follows this advice is going down a path of behavior that can really lead to two issues that can destroy most relationships - control and trust. It may work for a while, but if you're not careful your next book will be Shirley Glass' Not "Just Friends" as a postmortem since you probably won't have a working relationship for long.

Still, her advice on self-esteem is worth a read especially for those in the midst of a bad relationship. Argov is a comedian by training, and the book is relatively funny. However, using the messily divorced Meg Ryan and Kim Basinger's words as points to live by really nails the problem: often good thoughts, but incredibly bad application since strangely enough, ultimately they weren't able to make their relationships work.

Instead, for the non-professionals, Greg Behrendt offers a lot more insight into the male mind with He's Just NOT That Into You, and Carolyn Hax a lot more reasonable advice on how healthy relationships function with Tell Me About It. For more heavy duty problems, try Haltzman's "Secrets" series - The Secrets of Happily Married Women and Men - along with John Gottman's large body of work, starting with Why Marriages Succeed or Fail.

3 stars. Kind of like eating a pint of Haagen Dazs, where it may make you feel good for a little while but creates more issues down the road.
22 internautes sur 25 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
5.0 étoiles sur 5 Every Woman Needs This Book 7 juin 2006
Par Reality Checker - Publié sur Amazon.com
Format:Broché|Achat vérifié
This book is perfect for those in relationships who aren't sure how to keep the fires burning and keep their men interested. It's a fact that men relax in relationships sometimes and women let them and are then surprised that things aren't progressing. This book encourages women to keep their independence and value themselves enough to not be afraid to lose a man if he doesn't give you what you want. It's okay if a man doesn't want to get married. And it's okay that a woman wants to get married. But it's NOT okay for them to stay together as there is really no compromise in that situation. The advice given by Ms. Argov is brilliant. The phrasing she suggests a woman use is perfect. She has a vision of women that, I believe, is beautiful. Strong and proud yet loving. Never demanding. Never mean or nagging. Simply gracious and accepting that men are simply different. I wish more women thought this way. The biggest issue destroying relationships is the fact that men and women expect each other to behave the way THEY do. It's impossible. And since men don't read all this stuff, I feel it's our responsibility to do what we can. Again, it may be unfair but that's the way it is.
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