Beyond Reason: Using Emotions as You Negotiate (Anglais) Broché – 26 septembre 2006
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Descriptions du produit
Revue de presse
“Written in the same remarkable vein as Getting to Yes, this book is a masterpiece.”
—Dr. Steven R. Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
“Powerful, practical advice. It will put your emotions to good use.”
—Archbishop Desmond Tutu
“A must read for anyone who negotiates—which is to say for all of us.”
—Elena Kagan, Associate Justice of the Supreme Court of the United States; former dean of Harvard Law School; and former associate counsel to the president
“A brilliant guide . . . Anyone who faces a difficult conversation, let alone a formal negotiation, can use this as a guidebook.”
—Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence
“Destined to take its place alongside Getting to Yes on innumerable bookshelves around the world.”
—Howard Gardner, Harvard University
“An indispensable real-world guide for anyone. Roger Fisher and Daniel Shapiro have brilliantly detailed a methodical system for moving emotions in a constructive direction. The NYPD Hostage Negotiation Team faces some of the most high-stakes decisions every day. We regularly apply the skills of Beyond Reason to create the straightforward dialogue that resolves the vast majority of our hostage negotiations.”
—Lt. Jack J. Cambria, commanding officer, NYPD Hostage Negotiation Team
“As the prosecutor of the International Criminal Court, I have to apply law to the world's most serious crimes. A real challenge is how to deal with people's emotions and to maximize the constructive impact of our work. Beyond Reason provides essential tools to understand how to develop solutions to even the most serious problem.”
—Luis Moreno-Ocampo, chief prosecutor, International Criminal Court
“The perfect follow-up to Getting to YES . . . The book is both profound and easy to read, based on a wide range of research and firsthand experience in negotation. There is no interaction setting—public, professional, or personal, local, or international—where its recommendations will not be applicable.”
—Elise Boudling, Dartmouth College
“Beyond Reason is exactly what we need now: a lucid, systematic approach to dealing with emotions, infused with a practical wisdom that will help you understand, enrich, and improve all your negotiations—and all your relations with fellow human beings.”
—Leonard L. Riskin, director, Center for the Study of Dispute Resolution, University of Missouri-Columbia
“The resurgence of interest in emotions has broadened the impact of research on brain and behavior. Beyond Reason takes this to a new level, showing how emotions can positively and negatively affect the way managers and other negotiators approach their goals.”
—Joseph LeDoux, author of Anxious, The Emotional Brain, and Synaptic Self
“Masters of diplomacy, Fisher and Shapiro of the Harvard Negotiation Project, build on Fisher's bestseller (he coauthored Getting to YES) with this instructive, clearly written book that addresses the emotions and relationships inevitably involved in negotiation.”
—Publishers Weekly (starred review)
“This is one of those unusual works that is so carefully constructed and written that you may find yourself praising its common sense and nodding easily in concurrence. . . . It is a book to reflect upon and that belongs on every negotiator's reference shelf.”
—The Negotiator Magazine
“In this valuable, clearly written book, the authors say good negotiations—in business as well as in personal or family situations—hinge on respect for others, but also respect for your own feelings.”
Présentation de l'éditeur
• Winner of the Outstanding Book Award for Excellence in Conflict Resolution from the International Institute for Conflict Prevention and Resolution •
In Getting to Yes, renowned educator and negotiator Roger Fisher presented a universally applicable method for effectively negotiating personal and professional disputes. Building on his work as director of the Harvard Negotiation Project, Fisher now teams with Harvard psychologist Daniel Shapiro, an expert on the emotional dimension of negotiation and author of Negotiating the Nonnegotiable: How to Resolve Your Most Emotionally Charged Conflicts. In Beyond Reason, Fisher and Shapiro show readers how to use emotions to turn a disagreement-big or small, professional or personal-into an opportunity for mutual gain.
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Commentaires client les plus utiles sur Amazon.com (beta)
Although the advice of the authors was generally helpful, I sometimes questioned practicality of following the guidelines in day-to-day affairs. For example, the authors encouraged the readers to document and discuss each of the negotiations as part of constant learning process, often spending sixty to ninety minutes in follow up discussions. As a manager of a development team with frequent meetings, such analysis would put a significant damper on my productivity. However, I realize that the book is not intended to be followed as a "manual" and each person may have to make practical adjustments.
Overall, the book is a "must read" for everyone, not just frequent negotiators. In the book, I found a lot of advice on how to respect the emotions that govern the meeting in many different settings. Since I learn best from seeing complex concepts in action, the case study that concluded the book put a neat "bow" on a very enjoyable and valuable read.
This book breaks down the five core emothions of feeling appreciated, alone, imposition, put down, trivialized. It covers business negeotion, but perhaps even more important is negeotiating with teens (but not two year olds), the mentally ill (ex-wives included), the drunk in a bar.
The techniques described here are given examples in buying a small item, presenting a case to the Supreme Court, to discussing border disagreements between a couple of nations. In short, we all negeotiate all the time, it works best when both parties feel that they got the best of the deal.
Fans of Getting to Yes have probably run into attorneys and negotiators who didn't want to play ball. These people may have been hostile, manipulative and short-sighted. But it's hard to reason with these parties using the Getting to Yes principles if you do not have your own emotions under control.
Beyond Reason is a much needed and valuable resource for dealing with the emotional context for negotiations.
The process for taking the initiative (express appreciation, build affiliation, respect autonomy, acknowledge status, and choose a fulfilling role) is constructive, common sense methods that anyone will feel comfortable doing. As helpful as that process is, I found the most useful advice coming in chapters 8-10 which describe how to be ready for strong emotions, being prepared for negotiations and the case history of the border dispute resolution between Ecuador and Peru.
The examples in the book are well chosen to illustrate the principles and breathe life into those concepts. Roger Fisher and Daniel Shapiro have a light touch that defuses your apprehension as you address this subject.
I also recommend that you read Crucial Conversations, a good complementary book on how to address strong emotions in others and yourself when they arise unexpectedly and unpleasantly.
For me, the most interesting part of the book is were the authors explain five core concerns -- appreciation, affiliation, autonomy, status and role -- and their effect on decision making. They provide sensible advice on how to use these concerns as levers to keep negotiations constructive. Here is a quote from the book giving you an example: "Perhaps the most powerful way to soothe someone's emotions is to appreciate their concerns. There are three elements in appreciating someone. You want to UNDERSTAND the other's point of view; FIND MERIT in what they are thinking, feeling, or doing; and COMMUNICATE the merit you see." I think that is a terrific way to put it!
The content of this book is one thing that makes it worthwhile. Another reason why I like it is that it is exceptionally well-structured. I like it when authors do their very best to make it as easy as possible for readers to understand their core messages. Fisher and Shapiro succeed very well in this.