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The Newlywed Guide to Physical Intimacy (English Edition) Format Kindle
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For the uninitiated or those with limited experience, but a strong desire or need to go beyond just the possible viable positions and methods of pleasuring one another, there is a lovely solution in Jennie Rosenfeld's and David S. Ribner's new book, The Newlywed's Guide to Physical Intimacy. I was fortunate to receive it through the Library Thing's Early Reviewer program.
This book surprised me with its clear and thorough explanations considering it was written by and intended for the conservative and ultra-conservative Torah-observant Jewish community. Even though the text itself is without illustrative photos and diagrams, there is a modest packet of explicit drawings tucked into a sealed envelope attached to the inside back cover. As befits a book intended for a chaste and conservative audience, there is a label on that packet warning of its explicit nature.
For some non-conservative readers, this lack of visual aids may seem quaint and non-helpful, but to avoid this book for that reason would be a mistake. This small book contains useful information that not only provides practical advice about techniques and mechanics, but also nurtures a sensitivity that will benefit both sexual partners.
Remember, this is meant for newlyweds both as premarital sex education primer, but also an on-going, nurturing manual that will enable and empower a couple to transcend inhibitions borne of ignorance or inexperience. The authors want their readers to find pleasure in both physical and emotional intimacy not only in their first interactions, but throughout their married lives.
There are the necessary basics: where things are and how they work; but there is also a strong emphasis on the need for patience and clear communication. To that end, the authors address issues that most people never consider, but which are necessary for an active, fulfilling sex life.
Make no mistake, this small book is not one to skirt vital issues: how sex smells, sounds, and feels for both the male and female; how to deal with unrealistic expectations; and, lack or orgasm as well as how to maximize orgasmic potential. There is a straightforward discussion of lubrication, how to deal with the constricts of religious observation as it applies to sex, causes of impotence, sex during and after pregnancy and how external pressure can affect a couple's sex life amongst other issues.
Even though I am not Jewish and have decades of sexual experience, I found this book to be informative and engaging. It is well written and thoughtfully presented. I will be gifting it to our daughter because I wish I had had access to such a beautifully written guide to sex and intimacy, and know she will benefit from the frank and full discussion within it. It is tastefully presented and should be read by anyone who wants to have a long, healthy, satisfying sex life with the person they love.
Or someone who wants to empower themselves and their relationship.
People need to know this stuff!
When issues arise in our sex lives we can feel depressed, distant, confused,lost and embarrassed. A book like this will help couples with a language to talk about their bodies, sex and their experiences.
Firstly, some people need help knowing what sex is and how it all works.
Secondly, couples need to know that sometimes things don't go according to plan and that sometimes these variations are normal. That they are not the only ones who experience these things. That they are normal.
Luckily they can now find out more without needing to go talk to anyone in their community.
They will also know that help is out there.
As Sex therapist (in Australia) I am especially thrilled that they have included a section on painful intercourse, which will discuss unconsummated marriages.
All I can say is - this book will save lives, relationships and families.
How awesome is that!
My only disappointment was the answer to a female's question about her husband refusing to do more than one position after a year of marriage. Respecting his comfort level is probably not the correct answer in that case. He is certainly not feeling comfortable, but it's probably a more serious issue that should be confronted. As a minor point, it was kind of weird how it changed back and forth from male to female perspective from one sentence to the next. I understand why (and appreciate it), but it was a little hard to keep up which perspective was speaking sometimes.
I wish the Kindle edition made it more obvious that the diagrams actually are included; they're not in the table of contents or where I expected them to be. They are at the end of the "parting words" section.
A must read.
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