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The Surrendered Single: A Practical Guide to Attracting and Marrying the M (English Edition) par [Doyle, Laura]
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The Surrendered Single: A Practical Guide to Attracting and Marrying the M (English Edition) Format Kindle

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Format Kindle, 24 novembre 2009
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Descriptions du produit

Cast your fears aside, ladies: in this case, "surrendered" doesn't mean "doormat"--which is not to say that The Surrendered Single might not raise a few eyebrows. Laura Doyle (The Surrendered Wife) has some pretty insistent basics for women on the dating circuit that may not always sit well with modern feminists. Don't ask him out? Throw out your mental checklist of what you want from a mate? Smile openly at every man you pass on the street? Expect that he'll pay for dinner?

Yep. And according to those who have already surrendered, this old-school stuff works. The book is easy to read; entertaining dating stories are mixed with lots of bullet-pointed lists focused on self-esteem ("good self care is attractive") and myth debunking ("no one respects flirtatious women") that range from truly helpful to slightly simplistic.

Following Doyle's techniques may require a fair amount of modification on your part, but her ideas are aimed at opening yourself up to a loving, stable relationship, rather than simply angling for that ring on your finger from whatever deer you've caught in your matrimonial headlights. If you think it's time to implement some changes in your dating routine, you may find just what you need by "surrendering." --Jill Lightner

From Publishers Weekly

Controversial author Laura Doyle (The Surrendered Wife) turns her attention to singletons in The Surrendered Single: A Practical Guide to Attracting and Marrying the Man Who's Right for You. Doyle claims that since the perfect man does not exist, women need to settle. In 27 succinct chapters, she explains how to find intimacy with a man by letting go of inhibitions about the way things are "supposed" to happen. Although many will perceive Doyle's approach as extreme and overly submissive, some of her tips are effective, e.g., "treat yourself as well as you want a man to treat you" and "every romance starts with a smile."
Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

Détails sur le produit

  • Format : Format Kindle
  • Taille du fichier : 1279 KB
  • Nombre de pages de l'édition imprimée : 306 pages
  • Editeur : Touchstone (20 novembre 2009)
  • Vendu par : Amazon Media EU S.à r.l.
  • Langue : Anglais
  • ASIN: B002XXGIJ4
  • Synthèse vocale : Activée
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  • Word Wise: Activé
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Commentaires client les plus utiles sur (beta) HASH(0x8a425918) étoiles sur 5 72 commentaires
62 internautes sur 67 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
HASH(0x8a26c51c) étoiles sur 5 Found My Best Friend and Partner for Life 1 mai 2002
Par Un client - Publié sur
Format: Broché
I followed the principles in Surrendered Single and it helped me to open my eyes and heart to the best man I could have imagined. We'll be getting married in 5 months. If people tell you that you are a catch, but wonder why you haven't "found the right person", this book is for you. If you think of yourself as confident and competent in other areas, but are afraid of disappointment in love, you MUST read this book. Great practical, sensible advice with lots of entertaining stories about real single women like me and you.
55 internautes sur 61 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
HASH(0x8a26c984) étoiles sur 5 Must must must have!!! 11 novembre 2002
Par Un client - Publié sur
Format: Broché
I opened the first page of this book and the first paragraph shocked me. "Dishonoring your desire to get married is a way of protecting yourself from disappointment and trying to avoid becoming dependent....Ultimately, however, such denial and control will stand between you and finding the love you crave. Surrender to your desire to be married and you give that desire the chance to become a reality" This was me! I ALWAYS said I didn't want to get married, I even had a list of over 100 reasons not to get married that I would actually cite on my dates! I thought guys liked women that were independent and didn't want to "trap" them into getting married. I couldn't understand why no one I dated wanted to marry me. At least I could say "no" I reasoned with myself, I just wanted them to ask. This book helped me get real with what was really going on with me and gave me the courage to open my heart to the truth. The first guy I tried these techniques on, it was hard. Letting him carry my bag when he offered instead of insisting "I can do it" Letting him pay for everything instead of making sure things were even. All of these things lead him into feeling like a man, and to my surprise, made me feel like a valued woman. After 7 months of dating, we just got engaged and will be married in the Spring. We have a great relationship. More than I ever dreamt possible. I believe that this book made the difference.
46 internautes sur 51 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
HASH(0x8a26c900) étoiles sur 5 Single Woman's Bible to Dating 23 avril 2002
Par Un client - Publié sur
Format: Broché
Laura Doyle has such an amazing, gentle and honest way to help you along the road of dating blissfully. Since I started to follow the surrendered single way of dating I am attracting a much higher quality of man. I have learned that I can still be a strong independent woman, while being feminine and adored by a man at the same time.
While it is a growing process, sometimes one that is uncomfortable. I am learning so much about myself and what I want in a relationship. I am learning to let men treat me like a real lady and I am not settling for any less than I deserve. I have also learned that things are not always what they appear to be so if I think a man is half way decent I will give him a chance to take me out. I have been pleasantly surprised now that I have learned to put away my "check list" in what I want in a man. I actually enjoy dating now. Sometimes it is still uncomfortable but the book has given me so many new tools to use to help me along the way.

I recommend Laura's books to all woman I know, married and single.
33 internautes sur 36 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
HASH(0x8a26c864) étoiles sur 5 The good and the ridiculous 20 juin 2011
Par Casey - Publié sur
Format: Broché Achat vérifié
First, I have to warn that this is not a book about male-led relationships along the lines of Michelle McKinney Hammond's books. It seems to be pretty superficial to me ... mostly about letting men pamper you and fawn over you because it supposedly strokes their ego. This is what she calls "surrendering."

There are useful tips in this book for women who are newly single-and-looking and women who have been in the dating game for a while and can't figure out what they're doing wrong. There are also some "tips" that I think are completely ridiculous.

The good ... most of the book centers on the idea that men are naturally attracted to femininity and that you come off as being more feminine when you let the man lead. Let him ask you out, let him pick you up, let him pay for dinner, let him lead the conversation, etc. I agree with most of this, as men are hunters and most of them are at least taken aback if not totally turned off when a woman begins to take on the traditionally male roles in relationships, like offering to pay for meals, dominating the conversation, asking for dates, etc. I also agree with Doyle's advice that if you want men to feel comfortable approaching you, you have to be approachable. That means looking at a man and smiling when you pass him, saying thank you when a random man holds a door for you, or whatever the situation may be. If you keep your head down and pretend not to notice every man you pass in the grocery store, on the sidewalk, or the subway or wherever, then there is pretty much zero chance you will strike up a conversation with anyone who might later ask for your phone number.

There are some insane things in this book, though. One is Doyle's assertion that if you don't let a man kiss you on the first date, it sends the message that you aren't romantically interested in him. She even suggests making out on the first date, calling it "having fun." That's just bad advice all-around. There are ways to express your romantic interest in someone you've just met without letting him put his tongue in your mouth. Besides, there are many MEN who don't like to kiss on the first date. If it's not something you're comfortable with, don't do it. Forget about what kind of message it sends.

Later in the book, Doyle writes about topics you shouldn't discuss too early in a relationship. Two of them (salaries and sex) I agreed with. But the other two (marriage and children) completely threw me for a loop. She advises not bringing up the subject of marriage (even to the extent of asking a man if he intends to get married someday) until you've dated him for several months and not having a "serious" discussion about children until you are engaged. I totally disagree with both of these premises. If you are sure that you are looking for a husband (not just a man to date indefinitely), then you need to know whether or not he wants to be a bachelor the rest of his life or if he intends to settle down at some point. Likewise, if you know you want to be a mother, you can't wait until you are engaged to have a serious conversation with a man about having children. She even says not to put much stock in a man's declaration that he's not sure he wants kids because many men later decide to have kids to make their wives happy. She also says to think of children as a fringe benefit of marriage and not the primary goal. WHAT??? Marriage and children are deal-breakers for pretty much everyone. Why on earth would anyone become emotionally invested in someone over a period of months before daring to ask "So, do you see yourself getting married and having kids someday?"

It's stuff like the above that makes me think the author doesn't know all that much about finding the right man, just about finding a man who doesn't mind blowing all his cash on you while you just sit there and smile and bat your eyelashes and look pretty.
34 internautes sur 37 ont trouvé ce commentaire utile 
HASH(0x8a26cb4c) étoiles sur 5 Want guy? Read book! 25 avril 2002
Par Un client - Publié sur
Format: Broché
Laura Doyle is my hero. She showed me great ways to manage the anxiety that I had about dating. Now, I am more relaxed and actually enjoy going on dates. I used to try to control everything about a date--only I didn't know that I was doing it. Now, I realize how men would get turned off if I called or asked when I would see him again. Now, I simply don't! With Doyle's help I have turned my life around. I focus on myself, and voila, men are calling. I go on blind dates, double dates, you name it. Most importantly, I can tell who the good guys are. I am so thrilled!
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